i wish i could write better
speak better
think better
be accepted by you and you
and not be brash in my opinions
and the things i’ll say.
but i’ll never be the classy
movie stars
like marilyn and greta
i will always be frustrated and confused,
at least it seems
and am i wrong to blame media and pop culture?
for feeding me the wrong ideals
attempting to dumb me down and behave
in a brazen way like the people on tv,
hunch over and paint my face like the people in magazines.
i’m a result of constant brainwashed garbage that recycles
through the new generations,
and i intend to break free.
it is a thin, aggravating line
i intend to find the answer to.
and until then,
i will stew in my room
of girlhood and womanhood blended
at a standstill,
trying to teach myself what’s right and wrong
how i should behave and dress
how to articulate my life accurately
according to the american standards of brain pollution.
i will be your jesus to victimize
and slaughter to please your disgusting agendas.
